Child of Love:“What is this I’m feeling…? It feels like… something inside me is being held.”
Love Himself turns toward you, His eyes warm, kind, and full of knowing.
Love Himself:“My beloved… that is Me… holding you on the inside. My love is within you, gently holding every part of your heart. I am patient with you, and I am kind toward you, because I am love.”
You sit beside Him on the deep crimson Seat of Love, and something inside you begins to soften.
His words settle deep in your heart, just like His living Word says, “Love is patient, love is kind” (1 Corinthians 13:4, NKJV).
Child of Love:“It feels… easy to be here with You.”
Love Himself:“It is safe to be with Me.”
You begin to notice your heartbeat… and then something even more beautiful happens.
Child of Love:“It feels like Your heart is so close to mine… like I can feel Your love moving inside of me.”
Love Himself gently places His hand over His heart.
Love Himself:“My love is alive within you. Nothing can come between you and My love.”
Your heart hears it, not just as words, but as truth, echoing gently within you… “Absolutely nothing can get between us and God’s love” (Romans 8:39, MSG).
Child of Love:“You really know me… don’t You?”
Love Himself:“I know every part of your heart. Even the quiet places. Even the places that have been hurt.”
You hesitate for a moment… then whisper,
Child of Love:“Those places… they don’t always feel safe with others.”
Love Himself:“I know. There are places within you that only My love can reach.”
You begin to feel it… His love moving deeper… gently… carefully… right into those hidden places.
Child of Love:“It feels like something inside me is softening…”
Love Himself:“That is My love… kind, safe, and full of understanding.”
You close your eyes for a moment, feeling His presence surrounding those tender places within you.
Child of Love:“What happens when something inside me is hurting?”
Love Himself:“I come close to that place. Just like your body sends help where it is needed… My love moves to where your heart is hurting.”
You feel it… right there… in that very place… warm… present… alive.
Child of Love:“You’re right there…”
Love Himself:“I am with you always.” (Matthew 28:20, NKJV)
This time… it doesn’t feel like something you are trying to believe.
It feels real.
You sit quietly beside Him, your heart resting.
Child of Love:“This feeling… this hug on the inside… will it go away?”
Love Himself gently turns toward you.
Love Himself:“My beloved… this is not something that comes and goes. It is Me… alive within you. I do not leave you. I am always holding you… right here.”
Something deep inside you settles into that truth.
You sit with Him a little longer, then ask,
Child of Love:“What happens when I’m with someone else… and they’re hurting?”
Love Himself:“You will feel My love rise up within you toward them. The same love you are receiving… will begin to reach them through you.”
You pause… taking that in.
Child of Love:“So… it doesn’t stop with me?”
Love Himself:“No, My beloved. My love flows. From Me… to you… and through you.”
Something awakens inside you.
Child of Love:“And through me…”
Love Himself smiles.
Love Himself:“Yes. A holy hug… given heart to heart.”
You sit there, letting it all settle…
Then you whisper one more question.
Child of Love:“Are You still holding me… even now?”
Love Himself leans close, His presence wrapping around your heart.
Love Himself:“I have never stopped.”
And right there…
You feel it again…
That gentle… warm… living… holy hug on the inside…
Your heart was made for Love… not judgment. Be kind to your heart and release people from your judgments… because judgment is a relationship killer. When you judge others, you don’t just hurt them… you hurt yourself. To the degree that you make someone else’s behavior about you in a negative way, to that same degree you bring pain and heartache into your own heart.
Judgment doesn’t just break relationships… it breaks hearts. It shuts doors. It closes rooms inside of you that were meant to stay open — rooms of trust, tenderness, and connection. But when someone you love starts hurting you with their own unhealed wounds, those rooms begin to close. And when that happens, it becomes so easy to slip into judgment… not realizing that judgment is only adding more pain to the pain you already feel.
Judgment feels like protection, but it’s actually a wall that keeps healing out. It’s a reaction to heartbreak, not a solution to it. And the more you judge, the more your own heart aches — because judgment doesn’t heal… it only hardens.
Judgment is the language of fear… and fear always divides. But Love… Love Himself… the Father of Love… the Heart Healer… speaks a different language… the language of Love. Love builds bridges where judgment builds walls. Love restores what judgment tears down. Love is the Heart Builder… the Heart Mender… the Heart Repairer. And when you begin to hear His Love language again, something inside you softens and helps you remember who you truly are.
This is why experiencing and healing with the Father’s Love from the inside out matters… and it counts a whole lot in relationship with yourself and others. When you choose His Love, you become a relationship builder… a heart builder. Standing up for your friends and defending them in their presence and in their absence is heart building. Speaking the better word to and about someone in their presence or absence is heart building. Looking for the gold in someone… especially when it would be easier to point out the dirt you see or know about them… is heart building. That’s what strengthens relationships… that’s what makes them come alive and stay alive. And the more you practice this, the more natural it becomes to live from Love instead of judgment.
As the Father of Love heals you from the inside out, something beautiful begins to happen. You learn to Love yourself and others with His Perfect Love and this sets you free. You learn to release people from all judgments, including yourself. You learn to be free from all judgments toward your own heart, and love others with the Father of Love’s heart. Your learn to see others … and yourself… through His eyes of Love. This is where healing begins to take root.
And here’s the truth in Love… when you truly stop judging yourself, you will stop judging others. When you see and think of yourself rightly… in agreement with the Father of Love’s view and opinion of you, which is your reality… you will begin to see and think about others rightly… the way Love Himself sees and thinks about you. When you love yourself with His Perfect Love, you will love others with His Perfect Love. Immediately fear will shrink… evaporate… evacuate… and poof… be gone. And with fear gone, Love has room to breathe again.
You cannot be free from judging others unless you are first free from judging yourself. So much self judgment… and judgment toward others… comes from not believing that you and others have been made in our Good, Good Father’s identity, worth, and value. You are able to love with Perfect Love because you were created in His Perfect Love. That’s who you are… perfectly loved by His Perfect Love. And when you remember this, judgment loses its grip on you.
And when this truth begins to settle in your heart, something shifts inside your heart. This is why judgment cannot stay where Love is healing. As the Heart Healer fills you, it becomes impossible to keep judging yourself… and impossible to keep judging others. His Love frees your heart to breathe again… to see clearly again… and to love without fear again. Healing always begins with seeing yourself through His eyes.
And here’s another layer of freedom… His Love also pulls the plug on your victim mentality. You begin to see others’ bad behavior choices as a reflection of their unhealed wounds. I learned during my healing journey this powerful truth. People do the things they do… or say… because of them… not you. Out of the abundance of their heart their mouth speaks… good or not so good. Out of the abundance of their unhealed heart they will act… think… speak… and behave. And when you understand this, you stop taking their behavior personally.
And when I ever speak of our Know Nots, I’m talking about something the Father of Love has shown me over and over again… some people truly do not know how their unloving behavior and words hurt others. They don’t know to the degree it hurts others. They are so wounded… so unhealed… so unaware… that they have no clue how their unloving words and actions damage hearts and relationships. They play the victim as if it’s everyone else… and they don’t see their part or own their part. They blame others while carrying a big ole log in their own eyes… and then accuse others for the specks they imagine caused their unloving reactions. And when you see this clearly, compassion rises up inside of you not wanting them to hurt inside but without excusing their hurtful behavior you or someone else you love has been hurt by.
Some Know Nots act as if they do not know but they know exactly what they’re doing and keep acting unloving anyway… which is still a sign they need deep healing. Some pretend they don’t know so they don’t have to take responsibility. And some truly have no clue how their dysfunctional… toxic… unloving behavior keeps killing their relationships and hurting even the very people they say they love. And this is why wisdom and boundaries matter so much.
Jesus forgave people of their Know Nots… therefore we are encouraged to forgive too. So forgive, yes. But forgiveness does not mean automatically giving them access to your heart to keep hurting you. The Father of Love is not asking you to let someone repeatedly wound you in the name of forgiveness. The most you can do is know your part… own your part… heal your part… and let them work out their healing vertically with the Father of Love. You cannot fix what only He can heal inside of them. And this truth should help to bring peace to your heart.
Before they can heal, they have to see their part… and then know how their unhealed wounds are causing destruction in their relationships. They need to know how to be loving… know how they shouldn’t be justifying their bad behavior or unkind words…know how to see others through His eyes of love… know how to speak and act with His Love. They cannot give to anyone else something they do not know… something they have never personally experienced in their own heart. And until they do, their bad behavior will continue to reflect their unhealed places. Meanwhile, you are still trying to heal your part with God. So, give each of your heart’s good healing time with the Father of Love first…that’s where you begin right now…
Their behavior will not change just because they say “I’m sorry.” I mean that’s nice to hear, but actions speak louder as they say. There should be proof of true heart change that comes with an apology. It’s not an overnight job to heal the wounds that have been there since you were a child or for a while. God is able to do anything, but your heart first has to be willing… willing to see the truth so it can set you free and then do the healing HeArtwork inside of you for lasting proof and change. The one that hurt you might genuinely feel bad for hurting you at the beginning or embarrassed others saw or heard about what they did… but that doesn’t mean or prove they’ve healed or wouldn’t do something hurtful to you again. They have to first heal the unhealed places inside their heart that contributed to their unloving behavior and speech. They also cannot give or share something with you they do not have… something they have never received from the Father of Love. They need the Love Teacher Himself… the Heart Healer… to give them Love Lessons and heal their inner wounds. And until that happens, loving wisdom must guide your every step.
Otherwise, it will set you up for a repeat of getting hurt again. Until they heal what is hurting them… they will likely hurt you again. They cannot give you something they do not know… do not understand… and have not experienced. And if they keep hurting you even after they do know…or keep justifying their unloving ways of speaking to you or about you… that is a clear sign they have more healing to do… and you need to make a wise and emotionally safe choice for your own heart. You do not have to put yourself in close relational access with someone who keeps re wounding you. Wisdom is not rejection… it is protection. And Love always protects.
And here’s something else the Father of Love has been teaching my heart… there is no revenge or vindictive energy in me. None. I genuinely pray and hope that those who have hurt me… or hurt others I love… will heal from whatever taught them or convinced them that it was okay to treat me or other people that way. I don’t want them punished… I want them healed. I want them to know the Father of Love… the Heart Healer… the Heart Mender… the One who can repair the places in them that their hurtful behavior comes from. And this desire for their healing keeps your heart and my heart soft.
But until they heal… until they get a different heart set and mind set… until they learn not to treat others in hurtful ways… you may need to give yourself some relational safe space from them. Not as punishment… not as rejection… but as wisdom. Safe space is not cutting people off… it’s protecting and preserving the peace and healing you’ve found in the Father of Love’s Love. It’s refusing to enable unloving behavior. Love does not enable what is unloving. Love protects. Love guards the heart. Love honors the healing the Father of Love has begun in you. And this is how you love yourself well.
Your greatest act of Love is not to let them keep hurting you… your greatest act of Love is to pray for them… to bless them… and to give them the healing space they need with the Father of Love so He can heal their Know Nots and unhealed wounds… the very places their hurtful words and actions come from. You are not abandoning them… you are entrusting them to the only One who can truly heal them. And entrusting is an act of Love.
You are not a victim. You are a Victor in Christ Jesus. So keep on healing from the inside out. The more you see… become aware of… and heal… the more you will not make their issues about you. They won’t be able to play you like before. The most loving thing you can do for them is pray for them… that they will come to know… see… and experience the healing Love of God from the inside out. And as you heal, you will see clearly again.
And hear this loving truth gently… the Father of Love is sorry for how they have hurt you. But He wants you to be free from letting them make their bad behavior your responsibility. Only Love Himself… the Heart Repairer… can fix what is hurting inside of them that causes them to hurt others… and you. You just keep working on your part with the Father of Love… healing your Know Nots with His beautiful healing Love. And in that healing, you will find peace.
And if you’ve been hurt, know this gently… Child of Love… you are worth consistently and genuinely being treated with kindness… respect… honor… and value. You always were… maybe you just didn’t know it or believe it. Maybe you didn’t know it because there were those people who told you in your life they loved you but misrepresented the Father’s love and kind of love to you. Only you and the Father of love know the answers. If you’ve armored up your heart, it’s time to disarm. As you receive His Love, His Love will free you to love yourself with His Love… to love others (including those who have wounded and hurt you) and to receive His Love from those who are still in your life who represent His love well to you. He will show you how to love… and how to be loved. And this is where your heart begins to bloom again.
I know it’s easy to lock up your heart quickly, but instead, invite the Heart Healer in today. Let Him go into the places you haven’t let anyone back into. Let His Love teach you. Let His Love highlight His Kingdom Lovers… those who have encountered and experienced His healing Love and will love you beyond your imagination… and will never want to hurt you. And when you meet them, you will recognize them by the fruit of Love in their lives.
Once you let the Heart Healer in, let the healing and blooming begin. Then enjoy His Love gifts… His friends, too… who will know how to love you with His Life… His Light… and His Love. Kingdom Lovers… keep keepin’ your Love on.
Heart2Heart in His Love,
Momo Smiley
Matthew 7:1–2 (NLT)Jesus teaches that judgment returns to the one who gives it… the measure you use on others becomes the measure that comes back to you. This reflects how judgment wounds your own heart first.
1 John 4:18–19 (NLT)Perfect Love drives out fear… and we love because He first loved us. This reveals why fear and judgment cannot stay where the Father of Love is healing you.
1 Samuel 16:7 (NLT)The Father of Love looks at the heart… not the outward appearance. This invites you to see yourself and others through His eyes of Love.
Luke 6:37 (NLT)When you stop judging, you stop being judged… freedom begins when judgment is released. This mirrors the freedom you described in your writing.
Proverbs 4:23 (NLT)Guard your heart above all else… for it determines the course of your life. This speaks to protecting your healing and creating relational safe space.
Romans 12:17–21 (NLT)Do not repay evil with evil… overcome evil with good. This reflects your heart posture of choosing Love instead of revenge.
Ephesians 4:31–32 (NLT)Let go of bitterness… be tenderhearted… forgive as the Father of Love forgave you. This aligns with healing from judgment and choosing compassion.
Galatians 6:1–2 (NLT)Restore others gently… carry their burdens. This echoes your call to pray for those whose unhealed wounds spill out as hurtful behavior.
Proverbs 19:11 (NLT)A wise heart overlooks offense… choosing patience over reaction. This reflects not making others’ unhealed behavior about you.
Colossians 3:12–14 (NLT)Clothe yourself with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience… and above all, Love. This is the heart of being a relationship builder and heart builder.
James 1:19–20 (NLT)Be quick to listen… slow to speak… slow to get angry. This mirrors speaking the better word instead of prosecuting others with harshness.
Romans 8:1 (NLT)There is no condemnation for the Child of Love in Christ Jesus. This speaks to healing self‑judgment.
Psalm 147:3 (NLT)He heals the brokenhearted… He binds up their wounds. This reveals the Father of Love as the Heart Healer and Heart Mender.
Matthew 5:9 (NLT)Blessed are the peacemakers. This reflects protecting peace and preserving the healing inside your heart.
Ephesians 2:10 (NLT)You are God’s masterpiece… created in His Love, worth, and value. This affirms your identity as the Child of Love.
Proverbs 22:3 (NLT)A wise person sees danger ahead and takes precautions. This speaks to creating emotional and relational safe space.
Matthew 10:16 (NLT)Be wise as serpents and harmless as doves. This reflects Love walking in wisdom without enabling unloving behavior.
Psalm 34:18 (NLT)The Father of Love is close to the brokenhearted… He rescues those whose spirits are crushed. This speaks directly to the Child of Love in the middle of the hurt.
Proverbs 14:8 (NLT)The wise understand their own way… but fools deceive themselves. This mirrors the Know Nots who cannot see their part.
Hebrews 12:14–15 (NLT)Work at living in peace with everyone… and watch that no bitter root grows up to trouble you. This reflects guarding your heart from bitterness while healing.
Psalm 139:23–24 (NLT)Search me… know my heart… lead me in Your way. This aligns with knowing your part, owning your part, and healing your part.
Proverbs 27:6 (NLT)Wounds from a sincere friend are better than kisses from an enemy. This reflects the value of heart‑building relationships.
Romans 15:1 (NLT)We who are strong must help those who are weak… not just please ourselves. This speaks to compassion for those who are unhealed.
John 13:34–35 (NLT)Love one another as I have loved you. This reflects Love from the inside out.
Psalm 32:8 (NLT)I will guide you along the best pathway for your life… I will advise you and watch over you. This speaks to the Father of Love guiding you in relational wisdom.
Nurture & protect your serenity and vitality by remembering that yes, miserable people do love company but that doesn’t mean you have to let them treat you in unhealthy, toxic, unloving & hurtful ways just because they are miserable. Remember that!! Your peace is sacred, and the Father of Love entrusted it to you to nurture, guard, and honor with His wisdom.
Truly loving someone means you would not want anyone else to ever suffer, hurt, be miserable or feel the miserable ways you feel. Truly loving someone means even though you might be miserable you would never want your misery to add anymore pain or misery to a person you say you love ~ especially if they have or are presently going through something very hurtful, miserable & painful. It is one thing to come alongside one another & support each other in healthy ways but there is NO excuse to take your misery out on someone else just because you are unsatisfied and miserable with yourself or your circumstances. Enabling is not Love, and Love Himself never asks you to sacrifice your soul to prove your loyalty.
Choose to love others through their misery ~ yes; however, you are not called to be the target they aim & project their misery onto just to prove you love them. You definitely do not want to be an enabler. Enabling is not love. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is step aside so Love Himself can step in.
When you truly love someone you show the highest form of love by choosing words & actions in their presence or absence that match & prove you are FOR THEM ~ not against them. Whatever you do ~ do not use your misery to excuse unhealthy or bad behavior. Rather you can bring your misery alongside their misery and positively support & lovingly empathize with each other. Honoring each other at your times of greatest need or misery while also honoring each other’s healthy boundaries (including honoring your own) is key. For only in the Presence of Love Himself can wounds finally breathe, soften, and begin to heal from the inside out.
Empathy without healthy boundaries is not love. Empathy with healthy boundaries is true love. There is profound peace when you let go & establish healthy boundaries with those who lack healthy boundaries. It is an expression of your authentic love for them & yourself by not enabling them or allowing unhealthy interactions with them to continue. Truly loving them & yourself whether far or near is praying for them & if needed or requested ~ giving them space to heal from the inside out with God.
As they become aware of and begin to heal from their unhealed wounds and issues that are making them an accomplice to their own misery ~ they will begin to see how they formerly made other’s hearts their misery’s dumping grounds. Wounded hearts often try to cast shadows on those with the nearest light, not realizing the shadows are their own.
If they are secretly at war with you (which really means they are at war with themselves) you will either feel it or find out about it. If they are not operating in a place of love or respect ~ their misery is gonna rear its miserable head. Their misery is gonna try to find company one way or the other. If it’s not against you to your face it will be against you behind your back. Observe & take action once you see any red flags to save yourself regret later. Remember you don’t have to make space for or give access to anyone who does not have your best interest at heart level. The writing will be on the wall. So pay close attention.
Remember there is beautiful peace and joy in loving others. When at all possible and it is safe & healthy to do so ~ love & support them from a close distance. Sadly sometimes people are so secretly & internally miserable with themselves they end up turning on you instead of turning towards you. The healthy or unhealthy actions & words tattletale on their heart that they are not in a healthy, loving, peaceful, safe or whole place ~ aiming their misery towards you. So, it may be necessary to let go of their hurtful “company” so they can turn towards & pursue God’s company. He will guard & protect you from further harm from them. Kindly remove yourself from the middle so they get their eyes, negative attention & behavior off of you. Your absence becomes a doorway for them to finally meet the One who can heal what you were never meant to carry. To see their logs you have to get out of the mix so they can come face to face with their internal misery in the safe healing Presence of God. As long as they see you they won’t see their part or how their internal misery has created their own problems which are also affecting you. As long as you are around they will see you as the problem & point the finger of projection at you as if you are the reason(s) for their misery.
So, let’s be our own problem solver! Instead of staying around for more of the same miserable treatment from someone that either sees you as the reason they are miserable or treats you like you are the problem ~ instead let’s be a part of the solution!
When we get out of the(ir) way ~ they will soon meet the real truths in themselves and find out that their misery stems from what is inside them. Why? Because they will still keep having the same problems (that stem from their own issues) even though you are no longer in the picture. Pray they come to their senses, clear their vision and allow God to heal them from the inside out. When they heal and see God rightly ~ they will be able to see themselves rightly which will then help them to finally see you rightly.
You were never their competition even though they compared themselves to you. You were never the source of their problem even though they fixated their attention on you in light of their own insecurities and low self esteem. You were not the reason they were miserable. They were an accomplice to their own pain. You just had to get out of the way so they could meet themselves but more importantly meet God in the core of their wounds and misery. For the Father of Love is the only One who can untangle the knots in someone’s heart & the “Know Nots” inside their minds…
Once they encounter God’s love they will finally be able to see clearly and come to their senses. Once they encounter God’s love and see themselves through His eyes ~ they will be able to see how their misery was self inflicted even though they erroneously tried to make you responsible for their misery. Once they acknowledge, own their own stuff and seek healing for all their issues that fed into their misery ~ they will come to their senses and hopefully partner with God and pursue healing from the inside out.
Misery loves company but you aren’t called to play with company that wants to keep making you their source (reason) for their lack, issues, problems or… misery. They are responsible for themselves. Their only true and one Source should be God. To look to you or anyone else to blame their misery on or to meet or fix the needs inside of them that can only be resolved between them and God is misplaced and unhealthy. You know that but THEY need to learn that.
Still some will not stop projecting their misery onto you no matter what. In these cases ~ this requires you to choose to un‑involve & remove yourself out of the mix so they can finally receive and meet the True Helper they really need in God. This is the key!! You aren’t in nor did you ask to be or stay in their miserable game where they keep trying to pin the tail on you like you’re the donkey. You don’t have to be the target of their misery anymore. If they won’t stop this necessitates you making the move ~ moving out of their way so they can meet themselves & come face to face with & own their part in their own misery.
You can still be love from a distance praying for them and cheering them on. Just don’t be so close they stay focused on you & miss their opportunity of focusing on, seeing & owning their part with God. If removing yourself allows them to become aware & come to their senses so they can experience & encounter God’s healing in the core of their being which would then heal their misery ~ then so be it. I am all for healing and healing for everyone!
Misery loves company is not your problem. Staying anywhere where you are always perceived as the problem is in of itself a big part of the problem. Untie yourself from the tangled webs of unhealthy relationships where your company is labeled the reason for their misery problem. You will never win in the land of their misery. So the most loving thing you can do is give them the blessing of your absence. Your absence becomes a doorway for them to finally meet the One who can heal what you were never meant to carry. If removing yourself from the picture means they’ll find the company of God’s presence to heal all the problems that are the contributing factor to their own misery ~ you will have done the most loving thing you could do. Not becoming or staying apart of the misery so they can find healing to get out of their misery is top tier self‑love and love for others.
To Him that is able to do exceedingly more… Let Him do it! Sometimes we have to get out of the way so God can do the exceedingly more He is able and wants to do!! I do not wanna ever be in the way of anyone I love finding the freedom of being freed from their misery. I know on the other side of misery is the most beautiful life that abounds in God’s peace, Joy, Freedom and the abundant life God has for us. I so want that for everyone! God’s love is the solution!
222 to the 222’tune Of His LOVESONG ! His Love Notes He sings over me composes His Love Songs -my Godsongs- through me! ~ ~♥ 2 ♥ ~ Momo Smiley
~ ♥ 2 ♥ ~ Momo Smiley